The Thing That Surprised Me the Most

It was a very vulnerable, authentic moment. We were sitting together in the circle, as we do each day,

He told me it was his first time ever meditating yesterday. About half way though the meditation he had to stop and leave the room. The reason why? “Because I felt too much happiness and joy.” He said. “I didn’t like it. It was scary.”

I was so happy he put directly into words probably the single greatest surprise I’ve discovered in working with a wide cross-section of thousands of people, from all different cultures, around the world.

What I have discovered is that most people are more afraid of joy and ecstasy then they are of pain and suffering.
To mildly suffer is normal. It’s the status quo. It’s the “human condition” right? You fit in.
Just walk down any street in a any big city around the world and you will see lots of people mildly suffering.
It’s very unusual, however, to walk down a street in a big city and encounter someone in a state of ecstatic joy.

A big misconception I’ve encountered is that our silent retreats are a voluntary ascetic form of pain and suffering to become closer to God, or enlightenment, or self-realization. What I’ve discovered in working with the power is silence is exactly the opposite.

Through the silence, the body and mind begin to relax, soften, open and expand. There’s a healing, rejuvenative, restorative, quality that begins to emerge. Layers of protection are continually let go until you feel your consciousness lie innocent and naked.The cloudy skies attached to various thoughts and beliefs begins to part and allow in the sun. The cells in your body become more permeable to the ever-present light. You being to receive new insights and creative visions.

You start to encounter something strange and perhaps even scary. It’s a quiet ecstatic joy that is not based on the external conditions.

It’s not based on anything that comes or goes.

It’s the simple joy of being.

When we can let go of the need to control, or make effort to get to a future moment, When we go beyond the should and should nots. We discover something immensely beautiful that can not be put into words.
That immense beauty is the essence of who we all are.

The mind says “I’m a bad person. I’ve done a lot of bad things. I’ve hurt people. I don’t deserve ecstatic joy. I’m not worthy of it. I’m not good enough. There are ways, and practices I teach to discover who you truly are beyond these thoughts. Yet the silence is true your true teacher.
Deep gratitude to those who just shared the 4 day Big Glow Silent Retreat in Thailand with us. We are inspired by your courage to face the fears inside you.
Deep gratitude to so many of you who have shared retreats, and workshops with me over the years.

It’s only in the essence of now that our future shines bright.
In community, we purely reflect the various textures of our divinity.
Together, in seeing who we truly are, we become all that we came here to be.

– Brian Piergrossi


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